I don’t need encouragement or advice. I just need to be sad right now. It’s difficult for friends to understand that there are days when you just want to be sad. They are programmed to want you to feel better so it doesn’t sit well with them. But right now I just need to be sad.
I don’t know where I am in my romantic life. There is someone. I love her. She loves me. But I don’t know if we’re right for each other. I don’t know if we want the same things. I don’t know if it’s going to last. It feels good now, but think to the future and things get blurry and we start tugging in opposite directions. But I’m not ready to focus on the future and decide whether or not to move on. I’m not there yet.
Today is one of those days where I need to feel sad. I need to be miserable. Just for a short while. Given that I’m very tightly wound up, feeling sad by myself doesn’t come easily, but I have a magic weapon: dog rescue videos. I go on YouTube and watch video after video of abandoned dogs getting rescued and I cry. And after a while I feel better.